Nacho Libre

The more previews I saw for this film the more excited I got to see it.

I think I left this movie a little disappointed. It was funny, definitely funny. But there was no balls-out funny parts. It was more like a constant 90 minute giggle.

Maybe I’ll need a second viewing, like I did for Napoleon Dynamite. I mean I did like it, I really did, but I just can’t help but feel that it was missing something.

I’ll have to think more about this.

The Break Up

Well, finally maybe we can stop hearing about Vaughnistan, or whatever the hell they are calling this couple, now that the movie has been released.

This movie is the perfect example of how Hollywood gets it wrong. They don’t understand why movies are successful and can therefore never consistantly put out good movies.

I feel like I am being forced to accept Jennifer Aniston as a Hollywood star. Someone who can open and carry a movie. I’m sorry, but you’re not going to get me to admit that Anniston was responsible for any of the money made on this opening weekend.

I’m sorry, she may be able to make a good movie every once in a while like Friends With Money, but she is nothing more than a tabloid star, not someone who attracts people to the theater. As evidenced by Friends with Money, Rumor Has It, Derailed, The Good Girl and Rock Star. Her only mildly successful movies starred Vince Vaughn, Ben Stiller and Jim Carrey.

I know it seems like I’m bashing and being overly hard on her. But come on, lets just calm down.

Now the reason we are all here, of course, is Vince Vaughn, and he’s funny. No doubt. But lets look at this for a second.

Vince Vaughns’ followup to last years smash Wedding Crashers gets it wrong most of the time. Wedding Crashers worked because it went for the jugular and didn’t quit. Vince Vaughn excels at that fast talking, take no prisoners type of humor. You can’t follow up a movie like Wedding Crashers with a dumbed down, nicer version for younger audiences and think you’re going to have the same success.

Wedding Crashers proved that you can make a hard-R and still pull in an audience. A cutesy, nicer version only stands to lose audience, not gain it.

And I love Vince Vaughn but this isn’t what he works well in. I want the Vince from Old School, Dodgeball and Wedding Crashers, not The Break Up.

That being sad, lets talk about the movie.

It has a few funny moments, mostly the scenes with Vaughn and Favreau, but struggles for most of its laughs. While Vince Vaughns’ character obviously had a problem with being selfish, the movie presented no reason why he would want to get back involved with the Aniston character. She was hardly likeable while playing breakup mind games with Vince.

Don’t get me started on the ending. Very weak.

If you like Vince Vaughn or Jennifer Aniston and only need a few laughs to enjoy a movie, go ahead and see it. Otherwise, I would recommend waiting for video or cable.

The DaVinci Code

The DaVinci Code was… long. Not entirely without merit, just… long.

As one of the two or three people on the planet who hasn’t read the book, I was able to go in without any preconceived notions or expectations and see it just as a movie, and not as the behemoth it has become.

For a thriller it really seemed like there wasn’t too much going on. Things seemed to pick up when Ian McKellan made his appearance in the film, but as for Tom Hanks, he may not have been the right guy to hold this together. Maybe his character was supposed to be a little boring, but he doesn’t seem to do much but stand around and have things happen around him.

I did enjoy it a little bit, and it did make me want to read the book, but if you already read the book, and most of you already have. You probably won’t enjoy the movie too much.

On a side note… there have been dozens of articles about all of the claims made in The DaVinci Code and how the church and church group is reacting to them and protesting them.

The DaVinci Code doesn’t claim that Mary Magdelene was Jesus’ wife anymore than George Lucas claims that the ‘Force’ is real and alive in todays world.

Pardon my phrasing, but the movie is god damn fiction. It doesn’t claim anything other than in this fictional world, here is what happens.

And why does everyone protest against the movie going crowd and not the book reading crowd. More people will surely read the book than see the movie. Are the movie goers somehow more susceptible to protests than people who read books?

X-Men: The Last Stand

There are going to be two different camps when it comes to this movie, I believe. Those who know the X-Men from the comics and those who know the X-Men from the movies.

Now, I feel I’m kind of in the middle here. I read the X-Men for years, but not during the time of the Phoenix Saga, which this takes some of its plot from. So, of course, I liked some of it and didn’t like other parts.

If you grew up on the comic books, you are not going to like the way a few of the characters storylines go. Completely leaving comic book continuity with several of the characters will anger many an X-Men fan. Especially since the direction the characters go in is not an improvement over the comics.

Now if you only know the X-Men from the movies, you probably won’t care about what happens to these characters. They weren’t being used to their potential and you have no idea what they should or could be contributing to the storyline.

Trying to get past all of this… the movie is still enjoyable. Fantastical battle scenes with really great special effects. Although there was alot of wire work. You might not be happy if you don’t like wire work. And a really neat sequence where Professor X and Magneto are made to look 20 years younger. Pretty successfully, too.

I’d recommend this to most of the people I know, I think you will all enjoy it.

An American Haunting

Now, I have to say initially that this is not a bad movie. It has good performances and it’s sufficiently creepy, and my problem with the movie is not really with the movie itself.

But I don’t want to give too much away here, so I will warn you if I say anything plot revealing.

An American Haunting is supposed to be based on the only recorded instance where a spirit caused the death of another person.

Now, to anyone who sees this movie. Is it not completely obvious what is going on here? I mean, if these are the events that happened could they not be explained away in minutes.

Spoiler ********

Is it just me or is it obvious that the daughter is faking everything so that there is enough commotion in the house to keep her father from molesting her? And the day after he dies the poltergeist suddenly stops showing up.

Will someone please let me know if I missed something, or if you agree I am right on target?

I don’t understand how this even grew to a legend.


Poseidon, Poseidon, where did you go wrong. A weak remake of a campy, but very fun, 70’s disaster movie, Poseidon seems to be missing some back story and character development that might have made this a good movie.

Of course the special effects are good. When you put out that much money to make a film now a days you know the special effects will turn out ok. But today, with audiences being bombarded with amazing special effects in every summer movie, you need a bit of a story if you want your movie to stand out from the rest.

A fire fighter hero turned into mayor… ok, what happened? A recently broken up older gay man about to commit suicide but changes his mind when he realizes he’s going to be killed… what was going on in his head? We’ll never know. A gambler who spends so much time on cruise ships he know the layouts of the floors… uh, ok.

It’s almost as if when the movie was being written, a one line backstory was developed for each character and thats all they went into the movie with.

Now if all you want to see is a disaster film, then you’ll probably enjoy this, but if something more substantive is what you are looking for, you will probably want to pass. You’ll be a little bored.

Mission Impossible 3

When I look at Michael Jackson over the past several years, I always think the same thing… God damn that guy is talented, why the hell does he have to be such a freak?

It really seems to me that Tom Cruise is going in that direction. He isn’t there yet, but everytime I talk about him with others I find myself saying, “Yeah, he’s a little off, but he can make a damn good movie.”

And that’s what I believe. Hopefully for his sake (I think) he will calm down a little bit and get back to being a movie star, because that’s what he does best.

With all that’s been going on in the news and world with Tom Cruise, alot of people are going to miss what turns out to be a pretty damn good movie. Far superior to the mess that was MI:2 and on par, probably better, than the first one.

JJ Abrams crafts a nice story rerturning the series to it’s ‘team’ roots, successfully adding a few new and a returning character into the mix and actually having them involved in the movie.

Amazing stunts and Special FX are to be expected and certainly show up in this film, including, for me, a stomach churning jump from building to building that looks great.

This movie good enough to oversome whatever bad press its star is receiving and I would recommend any movie fan go see it in the theater as this is the kind of movie that is best experienced on a big screen.

Dear Sharon Stone

Since I didn’t actually go see Basic Instinct 2 you might completely disregard my thoughts, but please, don’t make Basic Instinct 3.

Don’t direct it, don’t have meetings about it and don’t even let it enter your thoughts.

Maybe everyone involved needs to realize that Basic Instinct drew such a large audience because of Michael Douglas and not you.

Stop trying to force what you want on the audience and go find a great project to get involved with, like your Basic Instinct costar Jeanne Tripplehorn did with Big Love

Jeez, let’s catch up already

I realize I will never catch up and become current, especially with summer movie season here, if I don’t just go through and do this huge batch of reviews with just a couple comments on each.

So without delay, here is my catch up review list.

Failure to Launch

Cute and good fun, recommended. I’m really starting to like Matthew McConaughey. Terry Bradshaw was great.


Ok story, couldn’t get into the special effects. Skip it.

Brokeback Mountain

Really good movie, very sad, didn’t deserve best picture.


Very funny film, well worth the trip to the theater. Although no one saw it. I highly recommend it.

Lucky Number Slevin

Really good movie, good cast, go see it. Bruce Willis continues to entertain me.


Stupid funny, not too horrible, but wait for video or cable.

The Sentinel

Pretty good thriller, but easy to figure out ending. Go see it.

Thank You for Smoking

Very funny independent film, go see it if it’s playing near you.


Funny, goofy, Robin Williams’ best in a while.

When a Stranger Calls

When a Stranger Calls was better then I thought it would be, but don’t let that fool you into thinking that its a good movie.

The script and acting were pretty poor all around and the pivotal scene of the movie, when you find out the killer is in the house, is so poorly acted you wonder if they bothered trying a second take.

But the lead actress was servicable enough and there were a couple scares. Catch it on cable when it makes it there.