Where I Rewrite Anil Dash’s Fantasy Press Release

Anil Dash re-wrote the recent Twitter press release, now know as the Drop Dead Developers release, so that everyone could understand it better. Because since we are all so upset, it is obvious that we didn’t understand how reasonable these changes were and, in reality, they won’t impact most of us at all.

I realize my thoughts are probably going to be dismissed because I have no real skin in the game and just like to pile-on, but I thought I would try and rewrite some of the parts I think he misrepresented.

For Developers

How much do you hate Marketing? Worrying about growth, and worrying about how much to invest in your company?

Well, with Twitter API version 1.1, we answer those questions for you.

We know how much you would like to start developing new products for other services, so in Twitter API version 1.1 we have added a new feature called ‘Growth Cap’ which allows you to see just how large your application pool can get. No more wasting time and resources to get new customers because when you hit your limit, you’ll know it’s time to sit back and relax.

Furthermore, we are all developers here, am I right? Who has time for designers anymore? We have solved this problem for you by giving you what we are calling, ‘The Suggestions API’. With these powerful new tools, you can work on your app and websites knowing that the look of tweets you want to display has already been worked out for you.

You are not required to use these new API’s, of course. If you decide not to, great! You can continue as you were for 6 whole months.

For Users

We don’t want users of the Twitter service to think that they are being ignored in all of this developer talk. All of this is really for them and would like to highlight a few key improvements.

Send to Instapaper, Readability, Pocket, Email Tweet, Copy Tweet… We have all seen these long confusing lists of options of what we can do with the tweets in our timeline. But we all know, we really just want to READ them. So we are going to do our best to pare this list down to the bare minimum, which is NOTHING. Why would I want to send or share my tweets. That seems unnecessary.

Have you ever missed a Tweet that you knew was in your timeline? We have too. And what is the culprit for this you ask? Mute filters. That’s right, mute filters. How do we really know if we want a tweet muted if we haven’t seen it yet? That’s why we are now allowing you to use your Twitter clients mute free. No longer will you miss something exciting because of some overly aggressive filtering.

Did you know that users of the Twitter website are privy to offers and contests that are hidden by Twitter clients by default? We’ll no longer! Twitter’s new Twitter API version 1.1 now allows, encourages, and forces Twitter clients to bring these special offers to you too. No longer will you be in the dark, hidden from these important tweets. Furthermore we encourage you to interact with them.

Now, From Me

I am a frequent Twitter user. Much more for consumption than creation, but I use the service constantly, because it was great. It allowed access and conversation with people inaccessible to you in a way that blogging and email didn’t. Now, it is turning Google-ish in it’s drive towards advertising.

For the longest time, we were Twitter’s customers, and now we are becoming the product.

Well, I still use Twitter and will for a short while. I was a backer on app.net and assume that I will be moving there eventually. I will continue to use Twitter under a few conditions. As long as Tweetbot still works… Until my timeline becomes filled with ads… As long as my Send to Instapaper link works.

If one of those things comes to fruition, I will leave and move on. Maybe app.net, maybe back to RSS and Blogs.